When I describe East Coast vs West Coast culture to my friends I often say "The East Coast is kind but not nice, the West Coast is nice but not kind," and East Coasters immediately get it. West Coasters get mad. 😂😂😂

@tenderlove I thought this was a joke and was gonna say "damn, I thought it was The Ultimate Collection of Winamp Skins" but then I looked it up and this is real

so I know Bernie’s mittens are adorable, and I trust everyone on my timeline is legitimately finding joy in this, but I have to wonder- why is Bernie just sitting and minding his own business so memeable?

If We Raise Minimum Wage, What’s Going to Stop My Kid From Getting a Job at McDonald's, Making More Money Than Me, And Becoming MY Dad?: ow.ly/Bdno50De45g

i do not want to work at your startup

The Simpsons doesn't predict anything we just haven't fixed any of America's problems since 1989.

White journalists telling us why *we* need to listen to white supremacists are actually just different white supremacists pass it on.

Drinking a protein shake as dessert because FUCK YOU

@ckwright I got a bit taller after I started powerlifting, but that was before I started T. how straight your back is makes a huge difference!

The @WhiteHouse website contact form now asks for your pronouns.

it’s his jacket. yeah he’s wearing his jacket that he wears when it’s cold. what is this twitter.com/thealanjohnson…

Y'all, people know that Joe Biden isn't some magical savior. We know there's still work to be done. Accountability, all of that.

But today, people get to be happy *just* because trump is gone.

This has been ROUGH. Seeing him leave is reason to celebrate.

Let folks have that.

Instead of "Godspeed" people should say "dogspeed" because God isn't even real but dogs are like, fast

@ckwright you got shorter? my feet got bigger! shit is WILD

@ckwright thank you! I never thought i’d like becoming stinker and hairier but it’s the literal best????

Entering the Trump presidency // Leaving the Trump presidency twitter.com/ckwright/statu…

Gay people keep one secret for 10 years and then none for the rest of our lives

cis journalists truly write about nonbinary people like we're fully aliens 👾

if you wouldn't write "joe biden identifies as gender man and uses the pronouns he and his" then why are you saying your source "identifies as gender nonbinary and uses the pronouns they and their" lol

“flipping burgers” as an insult is SOOOO funny cause it’s like okay what do you do? type on a keyboard? uh oh watch out mister TypeALot is more valuable lmfaooooooo

@_birdmachine oh, i’ve heard about this with semen.

@sorceressofmath seriously, people keep saying “shanties” plural but the only one they ever specifically mention is this one, and remixes and covers of this one.

truly cannot believe that some cis people have the A U D A C I T Y to call themselves "bio-hackers" for, like, taking naps and not eating enough, when trans folks have been out here growing new genitals and upgrading their hormones and swapping out their facial features.

@sorceressofmath tiktok.com/@nathanevanss/…

@_birdmachine i’m sorry but EXCUSE ME you are doing WHAT with pineapples

Yeah sometimes you have to flush twice.

Years ago I read a tweet that said when you feel you hate everyone, it is probably time to eat, and when you feel everyone hates you, it is probably time to sleep. I think of it a lot and have passed it on to many a grateful loved one. Whoever you are, tweeter, THANK YOU.

Prob just a coincidence that everyone at the Trump riot had people in their personal lives who couldn’t wait to turn them in

Hey, were you put off learning to code because you were told you need to be good at math?

I am a dyslexic programmer and I'm here to tell you that doing a bunch of calculations is literally what computers are for, so no, you don't have to be good at them yourself.

Current events are drowning sea shanty Twitter.

@drunkenGeeBee oh, there are playlists. like: open.spotify.com/playlist/4yC16…

but every single individual shanty post cover/remix/singalong is based off: tiktok.com/@nathanevanss/…

everyone keeps talking about being obsessed with sea shanties, but all the evidence I've seen implies that people only care about that one sea shanty in particular, which is admittedly perfect.

Please follow one trans person on any social media platform before making these hare-brained pronouncements. twitter.com/schneider_cm/s…

I know I am not the first one to say this, but there are a lot of very well credentialed people in tech worrying what would happen if internet giants collectively de-platformed a group who isn't right wing, while totally erasing the fact that it already happened to sex workers.

Missionaries are colonizers and you can’t change my mind.

sometimes i want to be like "go off king" or "ok queen" but i'm not sure of a persons gender identity i'm like........ go off my liege

My brother just texted me: “I love the fact that the entire moral fate of the country depends on finding just 17 honest Republicans. It’s like some impossible task from a fairytale.”

@DebugSteven just... was so busy dissociating the first time that I don't even remember that time period, kinda

@DebugSteven y'know, I hadn't actually put much thought into it before, but this resonates with me a lot.

whereas before I was busy trying to ignore changes/pretend they weren't happening; now I'm taking progress photos and relishing/anticipating them

@bafeldman Can’t wait for the headline: “WEB DEV ENDS PRESIDENTIAL TERM EARLY; BLAMES JQUERY, WORDPRESS, AND NOT UNDERSTANDING MOMENT.JS”

We all owe Hideo Kojima an apology twitter.com/edgar_a_bitch/…

Americans only love the college experience because it's the only time in their lives they live in walkable communities

I thought I was being clever, putting the litter box on wheels so I could slide it out from under the stairs, but I have inadvertently created a Mad Max-esque vehicle which my cat uses to roll around the house, dragging himself with his front paws, the entire time shitting.

TRUMP SOCIAL MEDIA BANS

- Twitter: 12 hour suspension

- Facebook: 2 week suspension

- Pinterest: Rustic Wedding board deleted

- Livejournal: No song lyrics allowed as custom mood description

- MySpace: Tom removed as friend

If healthcare isn’t a right twitter is probably not a right

Y’all mad a woman is shot dead while storming a Capitol building but don’t care when a woman is shot dead while sleeping in her own house? 🤔

if you use a website to kill people then you might get deleted from the website

Conservatives: LET THE FREE MARKET DECIDE
Free market: *decides*
Conservatives: this is outRAGEOUS

@BethSkw zucchini, kale

Pacing in your apartment because of anxiety? Grab a weight, now your doing farmer walks, good job idiot!

reminder that "we can disagree and still be friends" applies to stuff like enjoying different games or characters. not human rights violations.

Basic bitches suggest the existence of an acidic bitch.

I think I saw Alien when I was like, five? there were no sex scenes after all, so it was fine. don’t even remember being scared.

which is WILD because I saw Ghostbusters around the same time and remember being TERRIFIED of the library ghost at the beginning. twitter.com/OregonRolledA2…

The big trouble with dumb bastards is that they are too dumb to believe there is such a thing as being smart.

We're not asking for you to shoot them like you shoot us.
We're asking you to NOT shoot us like you don't shoot them.

This is like the French Revolution except they’re storming the bastille to demand the king stay and keep starving them

Today has shown police don’t need de-escalation training, they choose who to escalate on, that’s not a training issue. Police don’t need unconscious bias training, they are conscious of their bias.

Please let this be real, this is my one joy today.

Wait till they find out all the other stuff this Via Getty guy has been up to twitter.com/TomMairs/statu…

Day 1 vs. Day 1,448

man, some of those that work forces really do be the same that burn crosses

twitter.com/JoeBiden/statu…

To anyone saying, "This is not who we are."

Yes. It is.

Slavery, genocide, internment, segregation all happened in America. This is the America we don't want to see. But pretending it isn't there gives it power because it goes unseen.

This is who we are. And we have to change.

If only America had some natural resources left, someone could come and bring democracy here.

RT this if you’ve been to an anime convention with better security than apparently the nation’s capital

damn turns out the fascists were the fascists all along

america distributing the vaccine

Disassociating from your physical vessel while working out is self care.

@maggiekarp big mood

I guess if you say it fast the "d"s kinda blend together, but are people deliberately pronouncing it "upsigh"?

this isn't the thing where you've only read a word so guess how it's pronounced, though I do that too. that's a separate thing.